Well, hello blog. It's been awhile.
I have some confessing to do:
1. I am wearing size 8 flip flops today. I normally wear a size 7-7.5. Yes, they are too big but I have convinced myself that no one will notice. You only notice when someone is wearing shoes that are too small because of the horrifying look of excess toe cleavage.
2. I am wearing my first true "maternity" shirt. It says it on the label even, you know, just in case you FORGOT you body was expanding at an alarming rate. I could get use to this type of wardrobe, its extremely comfortable when most of my daily living activities are not. So I will take comfort where I can get it.
3. Lately, I am lucky if I can keep my eyes open past 7:30pm. What happened to me? I have always enjoyed my sleep and a good nap, but now I feel like a zombie right after dinner. I know it can all be chalked up to pregnancy and I should get my sleep in while I can...but C'MOOOON....this is getting ridiculous!
Oofda...I feel much better now.
Last night I went to dinner with some friends, some of whom I haven't seen in quite a long time. It was great. We sat down in the booth and talked like we haven't been apart. We just picked right up where we left off. The conversations have shifted now, Where are you working? How do you like your job? Traffic sucks. Babies. Relationships. I loved every minute of it. I could have stayed there for hours. It really made me miss the days of sleepovers when everyone would stay up until the sun came up talking about everything and everyone, playing the dumbest games (Judge Judy, Light as a Feather Stiff as Board, Truth or Dare just to name some of the more embarrassing ones), turning the music way up and dancing like fools, watching movies, eating everything in the house and drinking way too many sugary carbonated beverages.
But we have grown up now and we have come into our own lives.
As I was driving home last night, I began to think about how much I missed my friends. I miss hanging out with these girls that I have known since I was ten years old. Have I drifted from them? Have they drifted from me? Is this how life is supposed to go where you bounce in and out of each others lives every couple of years, just checking in? I don't know. I don't know even know why I started thinking so far into this dinner date. I am not usually an over-analyzer of things, I try to take things as is, but this drive home was different. Is this just my raging pregnancy hormones taking over? They always come in handy for a good excuse. Life has taken us all down different paths, but here we are almost 15 years later after meeting, sitting down and sharing story after story. It's beautiful isn't it? Wow, these hormones sure do make a person cheesy.
I got home around 10:30pm, the Murph-man was waiting for me at the top of the stairs with his favorite toy in his mouth, wagging his tail, eyes still glazed over from sleeping, than he and his toy made their way back to bed. I was not far behind him. My husband was on the couch, "not sleeping" just "watching tv." Sure you were. After locking all the doors, and shutting the house down, he joined me and Murphy too. After a long day at work, dinner with the girls, here I am surrounded by my world. My husband, my dog, my baby boy, and my favorite piece of furniture in the house, my bed. With Murph and my husband quickly snoring, I couldn't help but smile. I love my life. I love this. I am more happy now than I ever have been. And with a swift kick to the ribs, I think my baby boy agreed.
Dani D! This is Big H. I just happened across this on Facebook so I thought I'd read it, I couldn't help pass up the "hormones" topic.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, this is all normal, all a part of life. When I was in high school I NEVER EVER thought my best friend and I would ever lose contact. But we did. We did for awhile. Granted I went to college in New Orleans and she went to college in Moorhead but still, our lives changed and we moved forward with them. Now, 17, yes 17!, years AFTER high school, my BFF and 2 other closest friends from high school have made it a promise that we get together at least 3 times each year, and try to do it 4. We don't just go to dinner - we have a sleepover! We stay up until wee hours of the morning, giggling, laughing, crying, telling stories - yes, drinking, legally now - (many of which I don't remember!) and just being friends....like we never missed a beat. We pick up right where we left off, just like you said. Every single time I meet up with these girls I am so happy we "reconnected" on a deeper level, as adults. Our lives are all pretty different, yet all very similar. We all live in different towns so we have our different groups of friends but when the 4 of us are together it's just like the old days.
I am so proud of you - not only, yes, is it hormones, but it's also part of becoming a woman, an adult, and a mother. You are an awesome person and no doubt, if you keep these things in perspective, you will continue to grow emotionally stronger everyday. Of course, the more emotions we have the more our emotional rollercoaster takes us through valleys and peaks.........but that's the best part of being human. That's what separates us from the other animals, and I think that's also what life is about. Trying to figure out what life is about.
Love you girl - hope to see you this weekend! <3